Different should be good...

I've been trying to pray often about this trip and how it will really be a different experience for me. The times I have gone there has always been two constant people with me, Erin Bennett(Miller) and Al Schuck. Two outstanding people that I have loved to experience Haiti with. I keep going back to this and wondering how it will be without them.
Without someone to say, oh, remember this and remember that. I don't want to keep telling the kids "this is what we did when I was here" or "this was so special because of this".... they'll get sick of it and it won't be the same anyways... but I still think there will be somewhat of a loss inside me. Even though God will totally be doing something new and different in me at the same time. I think those two feelings can co-exist, so I'm just trying to do what I can to prepare myself for that. It's already different right now, feeling like the trip and team should be more planned out and the team should be "gell-ing". But so far we've only had one meeting, and we barely talked together, so I just feel really disconnected and like I don't have a job besides trying to bridge the gap between the youth and the older co-leaders of mine.
So, as many of my journals tend to be, I am making this my prayer... that God would reveal to me new and exciting things through the youth and through the people and haiti itself. That He would continue working on this heart of mine that is so uncertain about my place as a leader in this trip. That any expectations of mine that I don't even realize I have, would be blown away and not get in the way of things that may go on. I ask you Holy Spirit to reveal to me what is is you want from me on this trip and use me beyound my imagination. I love you Jesus... Amen.

over and out my dear friends...